Have I mentioned that Louis MacNeice is my favorite poet? MacNeice was Irish, but history has labeled him as a part of a British group of poets informally known as “the thirties poets.” These were poets who were writing about Europe in the 1930s, sharing their concerns about the possibility of another world war. As most of their opinions were extremely liberal, they were watched closely and criticized harshly—some for their viewpoints on war, and others for their writing style. MacNeice was not immune to this backlash: an attack of appendicitis left him so ill and weakened that he could not serve in World War II, so he was maligned in the press for writing about the war rather than serving in it. 
Literary critics also took aim at what they saw as his “overly sentimental, Irish style”—he wove his own views, memories, and feelings about his childhood into his work. In response to his critics, MacNeice wrote:
“I am not able, and I do not want, to abandon the world-view that I acquired in childhood. So long as I remain alive and well I shall continue to feel strongly about prose style, to love the surface of the earth, and to take pleasure in useless scraps of information. It is no use trying to suppress that side of myself.”
I’ve read that statement of his before and have always appreciated his unapologetic self defense. I didn’t know until last week, when I read another biography of him, that he had followed that statement with a list of his core beliefs—beliefs he’d held since he was a child and knew he’d hold until death. Unfortunately for us readers, his list is owned by his estate and has not been made public. But the idea of it intrigued me. Since I began the process of recovery, I’ve been on a journey of self-discovery in order to become the woman God created me to be. Reading about MacNeice’s list of beliefs inspired me to list my own, as another step along that journey. I encourage you to make the same kind of list: you might discover, as I did, that writing down the beliefs that you hold as absolutes is an enlightening, self-affirming exercise. This is my list:
I believe that I’m saved through God’s grace.
I believe that love of any kind is worth fighting for.
I believe that hope is necessary to survival.
I believe that there is always a light in the darkness—even if I can’t see it.
I believe that joy comes in the morning—even when I don’t feel it.
I believe in looking up to my Savior and looking up to the beauty of His creation.
I believe that if something matters to me, it matters to God.
I believe that God sees me, knows me, and loves me.
I believe that words have the power to change lives—to spark rebellions, to entertain, and to inform.
I believe that gratitude is a transformative way of life.
I believe that weakness is a gift because it forces me to find my strength in God.
I believe in broken hallelujahs and mended hearts.
I believe that with God leading the journey, recovery is not only possible but probable.
I believe that I’m powerless without God: that I can’t, He can, and I must let Him.
I believe that families are complicated, beautiful gifts that must be cherished and treated with loyalty, forgiveness, grace, and love.
I believe that transparency and honesty are far more important than the illusion of perfection.
I believe in holding hands and letting go of hurts.
I believe joy is a deliberate choice, not a random feeling that sometimes graces me with its presence.
I believe that music, art, and literature should be integral parts of our daily lives, not occasional treats.
I believe that siblings make the best kind of friends.
I believe in dropping everything to watch the sun set or rise.
I believe in wishing on stars and birthday candles.
I believe that conformity is boring, and differences should be celebrated.
I believe that God gave me a special gift when He created cats: they are as strangely attuned to my particular mindset as I am to theirs.
I believe in being fully awake to take notice of every moment I’m alive.
I believe that poetry is the language of the soul—its agony and its joy.
I believe that pain is a temporary stop on my journey, not a permanent dwelling place.
I believe that laughter really is the best medicine.
I believe that Monty is God’s greatest gift of love to me.
I believe that every square inch of this earth is alive with beauty.
I believe that God still performs miracles.
I believe in never missing an opportunity to look up at the moon.
I believe that every single person matters to God and should be treated with dignity and love.
I believe that curiosity is a way of life, and learning should never stop.
I believe in wearing pajamas as much as possible.
I believe that love always wins. Always.
I believe that the reason I’m on this earth is to carry the message of God’s love and grace.
I believe that prayer is the most powerful weapon I have to fight my personal battles.
I believe that fighting to see the beauty that God put in my life has saved my life.
I believe—finally—that I’m worth the fight.
And I believe you are, too.
“May I cure that habit, look up and outwards
And may my feet follow my wider glance.
First no doubt to stumble, then to walk with the others
And in the end—with time and luck—to dance.”
Louis MacNeice
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Comments 14
I love your writing, you have a beautiful soul. I have 8 months now and the only way I can keep going on this right path is by connecting with those who have experienced it before me. We all have to share our experience, strength, and hope to help each other. Thank you so much for sharing yours.
Jennifer, I’m always so happy when you comment because I feel connected with you, since we’re both in recovery. Don’t you love that phrase–“share our experience, strength, and hope”? I do–thank you for reminding me of it. Eight months is a big milestone–congratulations! The first year is hard, then easy, then hard–and then it’s worth it. So, so worth it. Thank you for sharing this journey with me.
Absolutely beautiful, friend! I love your insight and the thought to write your beliefs down. As a fellow recoverer, I too know that with God, “recovery is probable” having just over 6 years of sobriety under my belt. Life is beautiful and our God is awesome to bless us with second (and sometimes hundreds) chances. ?
Your sister in Christ and recovery,
Jenny Clark
Thank you so much, Jenny! And yay for you on your six years. I love connecting with other “sisters in Christ and recovery,” as you beautifully put it. God is awesome to keep giving us chances–and to draw people in recovery together, who otherwise may not have ever met. I’m so happy to have “met” you and appreciate your kind words.
Wow, that is an impressive list of core values, I love it and even as I do not possess a list of my own, I identify with most of them. Perhaps all of us, as you suggested should make such a list and post it where we can see it daily to remind ourselves of all that we value. I have read your list four times now, just to let it resonate within me and to give thanks to all you pointed out to me today.
Two that stood out to me ” I believe that weakness is a gift for it forces me to find my strength in God” and “I believe in broken hallelujahs and mended heart”. You already know I often use ” I believe joy is a deliberate choice, not a random feeling that sometimes graces me with it’s presence”. Each day I “go” find joy even if I don’t feel it!
If I may add one to your extensive and impressive list it would be ” I believe ALL human beings are absolute worthy in the eye of God and me”.
Thank you for blessing my day with this beautiful post Renee.
Klara–Making the list really did open my eyes to how blessed I am. I like the one you added–“worthy in God’s eyes and mine.” As usual, I appreciate the addition of your insight–and I’m so appreciative of your feedback. Love to you.
Beautiful thoughts as usual so well written, it amazing your thoughts are so much like mine, enjoy the simple things, love God and His son our savior Jesus, wow you really got me thinking this morning how blessed myself and my family are, thank you!
Grover–I’m glad we have such similar thoughts! Maybe it’s the Hodson genes? I felt the same way as you after I wrote my list–how blessed I am. Thank you for reading my words and for your kind and constant support.
I love every single one of your beliefs and believe them as much as you do. I’m going to try this exercise for myself…However, I may steal some of yours; I cannot write them as beautiful as you…so I may be stealing a lot but I figure I’m your sister so I can do that. One thing I know for sure..I believe I have an amazing sister who writes more beautiful than the day before and I should never take for granted that I get to be related to you!
Dear, dear Lisa–Thank you. I wish I could hug you right this minute! Try the exercise for yourself first, for two reasons–1. You and I are not very much alike, so yours will be much different. And 2. Stealing is a sin. You don’t have to steal them, anyway–help yourself. I’m so glad you liked this post and I’m so very, very grateful to be blessed by you this morning. I love you.
Lisa, I agree you have an amazing sister–I have adopted Renee as my ” third daughter”, I like the idea of a larger family and especially love the idea of such a gifted extra daughter!
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Klara– ❤❤❤
Good morning, Sparrow. I am being repetitious, but Your Blogs, are simply Amazing Beautufully written, well thought out. I smile, think, when I read this one.I seem to always find a similarity to you, and My Mom.. .Before going on , I think you and My Mother, Marion, are “somehow” connected through “time and space”. The list you composed, I feel are a “mirror” of what Mom told me, as I was growing up. First, Yi7 have to feel that “joy in your heart”,from within, true, no illusions. When you hit a “roadblock” in life, Pray. God will lead your,my journey. I am, as a Believer “a work in progress”. My Faith, it seems, grows deeper, everyday, in God, in people. Always be, “grateful”, a Big Mom commandment. As I have grown as a husband,father, have discovered, “one size does not fit all.. I have weakness, self doubt, I take it to The Lord. Mom would say “just Pray”. Let God take over the “controls”, Wheter it i# brokenness, weakness, there is always Hope in God. I sincerely feel I have been “saved”,;I can supply “references” to attest to this. God’s Earth is “alive” with Beauty, we need to “experience it”,”Everday, in every way”. Again, God ha# oerformeD a miracle in My Life. I am still standing, a solid Belief. Holding Hands, essential I; life. Finally, My Greatest asset And strength here on earth,Miss My Wife, Debbie, she is “Rock Solid”. I will close, Sparrow am sorry My List, “Mirrors” Yours, But, I feel there is a “connection” , between You and My Mom, And this would be her list. Thank you again and again,Sparrow for Yiur Beautiful Writings……Finally, a “ favorite” Hymn of my Mom’s, “Take it to The Lord in Prayer”(What a Friend We Have In Jesus). ❤️ TexGen…..p.s. Great song,
Harold–I’m humbled that you think your mom would have had a list similar to mine. From what you’ve told me about her, she was a woman of great faith and strength. And I do feel connected to her. We’re all miracles, aren’t we? And I’m so glad you have your wife to be your strength when you are weak. Thank you, TexGen, for the beautiful words–and for always, always inspiring me.